The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science
requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship.
-- Robert Heinlein
Why I Can't Go Out With You:
I'd LOVE to, but...
-- I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.
-- I'm attending the opening of my garage door.
-- The monsters haven't turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots.
-- I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.
-- I have to fulfill my potential.
-- I don't want to leave my comfort zone.
-- It's too close to the turn of the century.
-- I have to bleach my hare.
-- I'm worried about my vertical hold knob.
-- I left my body in my other clothes.
Minnesota --
home of the blonde hair and blue ears.
mosquito supplier to the free world.
come fall in love with a loon.
where visitors turn blue with envy.
one day it's warm, the rest of the year it's cold.
land of many cultures -- mostly throat.
where the elite meet sleet.
glove it or leave it.
many are cold, but few are frozen.
land of the ski and home of the crazed.
land of 10,000 Petersons.
Hello. Jim Rockford's machine, this is Larry Doheny's machine. Will you
please have your master call my master at his convenience? Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
-- "The Rockford Files"
A billion seconds ago Harry Truman was president.
A billion minutes ago was just after the time of Christ.
A billion hours ago man had not yet walked on earth.
A billion dollars ago was late yesterday afternoon at the U.S. Treasury.
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't,
don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
-- Joseph Heller, "God Knows"
Whenever one person is found adequate to the discharge of a duty by
close application thereto, it is worse execute by two persons and
scarcely done at all if three or more are employed therein.
-- George Washington, 1732-1799
"The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The
terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency."
-- Albert Einstein